Politics & Kids

(not always a conversation you are ready to have!)

Politics is always a hot button issue, and we haven’t been given a handbook about how to approach these conversations with our kids. 

But in case you are interested, here is how I approach political discussions with my daughters, and why I approach them that way.

OUR APPROACH STEP #1: We talk openly about pretty much EVERYTHING with our kiddos (including politics). 

The first thing is that I have always spoken very openly with my girls about everything INCLUDING politics. (Sidenote: my girls are 6, 10 and almost 13) I decided far before I had kids that I would talk with them about politics and the world around them starting at a young age. This is because I felt completely unprepared to vote and engage in political discussions when I turned 18. I was gobsmacked to discover that I had ZERO idea ABOUT so much of what happened outside my little bubble growing up. Because of this I decided I wanted to make sure that my kids had a very, very clear feeling of of their own safety, but also a very clear understanding that they indeed lived in a bubble. It was important to me that they know there are other things outside of our household and outside of our little circle that are important and shaping the world in which they lived. 

To be clear, my husband and I don’t always agree on everything, and we get into heated discussions about different aspects of a political nature (Ok, I get heated, he doesn’t really). But part of the openness in our house is our desire to have our girls to see us respectfully disagree with one another.

OUR APPROACH STEP #2: We keep conversations developmentally appropriate. (They don’t always need ALL the details!)

The second thing we focus on when discussing politics with our kids, is that we keep the conversations developmentally appropriate. What this means in a nutshell is, they don’t need to know every single detail. What we do share largely depends on their age. Often when sharing difficult stories or political information, we will start very small, and then ask if they have more questions or ask if they want more information. My 13 year old, can take a lot more, and understands a lot more than my 10 year old. My desire is to keep them apprised of big events, but also keep them shielded from things that are difficult for even adults to comprehend. 

OUR APPROACH STEP #3: We attempt to share BOTH sides of the story/issue. (Not always easy, but so important!)

The third thing that we do when discussing politics with our kids is to share the other side. When I share with them that I support this candidate, or this policy, I also share what someone who doesn’t agree with me might say. This is important since we are friends with many people who don’t see the world the way I do. For this reason I want to help them understand where other people might be coming from and why they are perceiving situations, candidates or policies differently than me. Ultimately, I want my girls to recognize that I am not trying to brainwash, I am giving them information and paradigms to make decisions for themselves. Regardless of how I feel, I want them to recognize that people come from different situations and have different perspectives, and there are often two or more sides to every situation. 

OUR APPROACH STEP #4: We keep these conversations CONFIDENTIAL. (…until they are old enough to form and discuss their own well thought out opinions) 

Finally, when we discuss politics,  these are “car conversations.” We started off calling them that because they often happen in the car, and our car is like a bubble. What is discussed in the car, stays in the car particularly when it comes to controversial topics! These could be topics on politics, sex, religion, Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny.  Basically anything where I have shared openly with my kids, but I know that not everyone has shared openly with their kids, is a conversation that stays in our family. I recognize that while my kiddos are intelligent, they cannot – at their age – fully grasp and understand the issues fully enough to engage with others in these difficult conversations. 

RECAP of how we approach political conversations with our kids 

1. TALK WITH OUR KIDS ABOUT POLITICS 

2. KEEP THEM ON A NEED TO KNOW BASIS

3. SHARE BOTH SIDES OF ISSUES

4. KEEP CONVERSATIONS WITHIN THE FAMILY 

We are raising fierce girls who are going to change the world. They need to have the information in order to choose thoughts that are positive from a place of knowledge not ignorance in order to create lives that are going to make a difference so they can be empowered to go out and change the world.